too blessed

I am sitting in bed on my lap top as Brandon is asleep next to me snoring away! Jaxen is in the next room breathing heavy to where I can hear him from here and the 2 basset hounds are snuggled up in the other room cozy and quiet on their beds! I am so blessed! I take so many things for granted that I don't pause to observe them most of the time! I am surrounded with so many people that love me and poor their love onto me! God has blessed us with good health, a roof over our head, food in the pantry, more clothes then can fit me, too many shoes to count, great relationships, a fantastic church with the Godliest pastor I've ever been under, a good paying job, friends that are a hoot, family lives close, the list goes on...
Today as a service project with our small group from church we volunteered at the Salvation Army. We unloaded a truck full of food and then sorted and re-packed the food for people to be given! I wasn't around the poor and desperate people that need the food, but it still blessed me. It blessed me in the way that it was so nice to see how much food was donated to people there was no face with. Thankful I live in a country where food is one thing we never go with out!

Crazy Love

I haven't blogged often for simply lack of anything blog worthy. Some days all I want to write about is missing my dad and how much of a void I feel without him here. But I choose to not be depressing or sad. Other days I feel that I'm simply going through the motions between working, mom-ing, wife-ing, etc. simply living life with nothing new to blog about.

However, I am here today to post about the current book we are doing our Bible study on Wednesday nights about! My husband is leading a small group Bible study at church on Crazy Love. I'm not a reader! I'll define that better...I pretty much loath reading books. I get bored and it takes me forever to read anything since I make different voices up for each character. The book Crazy Love is a very convicting read!

"Have you ever wondered if we're missing it? It's crazy, if you think about it. The God of the universe-the Creator of nitrogen and pine needles, galaxies and E-minor-loves us with a radical, unconditional, self-sacrificing love. And what is our typical response? We go to church, sing songs, and try not to cuss. ...when you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything."

Luke 6:32-36 says If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even "sinners" love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even "sinners" do that. And if you lend to those from who expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even "sinners" lend to "sinners," expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

I am learning so much! Even growing up in church and being around Christians my entire life there is so much to learn about how to love like Christ!

update

I've added some new things to the Etsy store today! I plan to finish 8 new recipe boxes and upload them by the end of the weekend! Keep checking for new items! My new favorite is the duct tape brooch! Check it out! www.onegirlscurls.etsy.com

My baby turned 2 in Sept!! I still can't believe I am a parent of a full blown todler! I look at people that have 11 year old children and they seem so old and that stage of life seems so far away! I'm afraid we'll be there before I want! Here is a picture of my sweet baby on his birthday!

Jesus Bring the Rain

I have set down to start this blog many times and have ended up hitting the back space button and staring at a blank page. My dad has won battle of cancer! He is no longer suffering in the awful cancer ridden body that was once the shell I hugged and loved on for 27 1/2 years! Heaven gained a great man on September 14, Wednesday night around 5:40 pm. I'm sure the angels rejoiced for the weary soul that was able to walk on the streets of gold that he had only dreamed about but became reality in the blink of an eye. I'm sure he was welcomed in the presence of my God with open arms and greeted with "Well done my faithful servant, welcome home!"
We all sat by his bedside as he slipped from this life to the next. I wish I could say we knew what was happening, but truthfully we did not know what was happening that very moment. However, we were there as a family and we all had a very private time that I will never forget. We had a beautiful funeral service Friday night Sept. 16 here in Springfield and then we all traveled up to his home town in Indiana and had another set of services up there along with a burial service on Tues Sept 20. Salvation was preached at both services and I know my dad would have been very proud of how everything was handled and said.
Since my dad was diagnosed with cancer he learned to play the guitar, simply to play and sing one song. In June of this year he sang and played Mercy Me's "Jesus Bring the Rain" so I will close with an exert from the song that he sang and lived with all his might.

I can count a million times

People asking me how I

Can praise You with all that I've gone through,

The question still amazes me

Can circumstances possibly

Change who I forever am in You?

Maybe since my life was changed

Long before these rainy days

It's never really ever crossed my mind

To turn my back on You, oh Lord

My only shelter from the storm,

but instead I draw closer through these times

So I pray,

Bring me joy, bring me peace, bring the chance to be free, bring me anything that brings You glory, and I know there'll be days when this life brings me pain but if that's what it takes to praise You, Jesus, bring the rain

The Big Boy Bed

I haven't blogged for a few weeks, partly because I don't want all my posts to be depressing with how Dad is doing so I was waiting for "something" blog worthy to type about! This week we have taken apart the baby crib and given Jaxen his big boy bed!!
He now has a car bed! He loves it! He immediately stood up and said "jump, jump!" I was confident he would adapt quickly and without problems. However, I was slightly wrong! The first few nights were awful!! After 45 minutes of blood curdling screams we decided it wasn't going to be as smooth as we hoped for! But each night has gotten a little better and we're anticipating normalcy any night now!
Next Saturday my baby boy will be 2!! We're planning a McDonald's birthday party so I will have pictures soon!!

Barbie Cake/Roller Skating!

This past weekend we got to go to Brandon's home town to celebrate our niece's birthday! Here is a picture of Jaxen sportin' his back pack with his cousins! He loves being the center of attention and the only boy! This picture was taken at Spaghetti Warehouse and the kids loved playing!
Our Emily was turning 7 and had a skating party! We were very anxious to see how Jaxen did with skates and everything that goes with that! Loved every bit of it!! They didn't have his size of skates so he was wearing 3 sizes too big! At first we stood him up and it was hilarious! He was like a wet noodle but within 20 minutes he was doing great and refused to use our hands for help! He was taking baby steps and didn't fall hardly at all! Being a parent puts such a great new spin on everything!

I got to make the cake for the party! This was my first Barbie cake and it was a blast! It took me 2 hours to decorate it after it baked for more then 2 hours but it was so so worth it! Emilly loved it and I'm super stoked that she'll remember it forever!!!

Daddy and Jaxen

I am so thankful that God chose to give us months to spend preparing to give Daddy to Heaven! So many people don't get any warning their loved one is dying and don't get to say how much they love them or mentally and emotionally prepare themselves. I thank God tha tHe has given us this time with my dad! The top picture that is shown was taken on June 10 and the bottom picture was taken tonight. 2 months and here we are! His belly is so swollen from retaining fluid so it is hard to tell how much weight he has lost, but he sure does look skinnier! Let me get this out there...I refuse to say that he is "loosing the battle to cancer" or when he dies that "he has lost the battle to cancer"! He is the strongest man I know for enduring what he has gone through these past 3 years and what this awful disease is doing to him he isn't loosing any battles! He is gaining his mansion in Heaven and getting to be with his creator! We are loosing him but he isn't loosing anyting! That's my rant! :o)

My Jaxen

Oh my little Jaxen! He has captured my heart so much! He will be 2 on September 17th and is, as the saying goes, "all boy"!! All my life I wanted to be a mom, who doesn't! For whatever reason God chose to let us have dificulty getting pregnant. I can't say that I know why He chose for us to wait, but what I do know is that Jaxen was so worth every struggling month of a failed pregnancy test and every tear that was shed during that time! He has brought me such joy and fun! He loves to wrestle and rough house, but also knows the perfect time to cuddle and hug! I believe that being a parent helps me realize a glimpse of the sacrifice it was for God to give Jesus up! How could a Father willingly give up his only son, whom was perfect and without blame for me...a selfish, pathetic, Christian whom deserves to hell without escape! God is so gracious to us to offer us that sacrifice and a way out!

It's Monday

I just started reading the book "Crazy Love." I will tell you I am definitely not, nor have I ever claimed to be a person that enjoys reading as a form of entertainment! That being said I am taking my time and really enjoying each page of this book! Brandon will be teaching the book as an elective on Wednesday nights at church starting in Sept. but I wanted to get a head start on it since I don't read very fast and wanted to take the class with him. The author explains in depth his view on how we should respond to what Christ has done for us! He has such a down to earth approach and a real way of expressing his views! I recommend this book to anyone that wants to look at Christianity in a fresh view!
Dad is still hanging in there. He has lost more weight and is much more sluggish then he used to be. It's hard to believe that 2 months ago we were taking our family pictures while Amber was in town, I look at those every day and am so thankful that we got them done when we did! That was God's timing for sure! He doesn't look like himself or even carry on much of a conversation much any more. 2 weeks ago I had Friday off work and he wanted to come help me get some things done and so during Jaxen's nap time he was helping me with dishes. Standing there next to each other I asked him if he was scared of what was going to happen within the next few months and he answered a confident no and that he was just ready to go now and would rather not have to wait and be a burden on anyone in the future. I reassured him that we would all take care of mom for him and to not worry about that. We spoke of who all he will see in heaven that has preceded him and how cool that will be to hold my sister Lisa's baby she lost! We all have that peace that passes any understanding of what is happening. God is in control and we all know that this is part of His plan! Thank you for your continued prayers!

A letter to God

If I could write a letter to God this might be what I would write:
Dear God,
I respectfully have a few questions that are on my heart lately that I need your help with. Nothing silly like why in the world did you give us mosquito's although that would be nice to have an answer to. But more serious questions like for instance, why is it that we tithe and give to missions like you ask us to, but there is still more month at the end of the of our budget? Why do you allow young school aged girls that come from awful backgrounds and have no means to support a child get pregnant while I have friends that are good Godly Christians are unable to get pregnant? Why do you allow abortion to be legal and take so many innocent lives every day? Why the horrible "natural" disasters? Why is it that we are willing to serve You in full time ministry but we can't seem to get a job doing so? Why are you allowing my Dad to endure this horrific disease we call cancer? Why will you take his life so early, before he is able to see my brother get married or my son go to kindergarten? Why does he have to feel such pain in the body you have given him here on earth? How can I have such a peace and not be upset with you the giver and taker of life? What will this "daddy's girl" do on Father's Day next year?
Love, Melissa

If God were to take time to write back it might look like this:
Dear Child,
I love you so much! Please be patient and realize you can't see the whole picture that I have drawn for you. I wish you could see your life through my eyes and know that I have a reason for everything that is aloud to happen there on earth. Take joy in knowing that your earthly Dad will be with me soon and I will show him the wonders of Heaven that only you can dream about! He will get to meet Peter, Moses, Abraham, and Joseph, he will sit and listen as they tell their memories first hand. I have prepared a place for him and it is something out of this world! It has a KC Chiefs room that is one of a kind! Know that he will be ok and feel no more pain once He is with me. I know you will miss him but you will make it just fine on the memories you have made with him in 27 years.
I love you my child!
Your Heavenly Father

Shatto house update

Update on the Shatto house!

* This past Thursday night was my last cake decorating class, I had an absolute blast learning all that I did! My final cake didn't turn out as good as I would have liked! It was meant to be a 2 layer chocolate on chocolate cake, however the icing turned out too thin and the top layer literally slid off the bottom layer...long story but we ate the bottom layer at home and I took and decorated a small 1 layer chocolate cake! I have been asked to do my first birthday cake for someone else! I talked them into allowing me to do cupcakes instead since I feel more confident! I'm excited!

* We introduced Jaxen to the potty chair! He's not a fan! We'll see!!!

* The last picture is a photo of a custom ordered recipe box I made for a friend! My etsy store is doing good so far. I've sold more off line then through my etsy store, which is fine with me! I will be hosting a vendor booth at an upcoming sale in August and I am super stoked about that!

* Dad is doing pretty good! The Dr.s office drained 5 1/2 liters of fluid off his stomach area today! He's lost weight and seems to be more sluggish but overall is still doing well! We are going on our "daddy daughter date" tomorrow night! That's his fathers day gift! We will be going to see Thor!

* I am letting my current craft projects dry while I blog this!

* I am so blessed to be so content in my life! I see so many people that are so unhappy and want to change so many things! I am so thankful for a loving and supportive husband and family!

One Girls Curls

I am very excited to inform you all that my Etsy store is up and running! I know in the realm of life this isn't that big of a deal but today in my life it is a big deal! I feel accomplished and anxious! I've already made sales from friends at work! I felt like it was a big under taking to start it all up and get an original of each craft ready to go. I must say the hardest part was finding a name for the shop! I had settled on 4 different names at different times and each one I wanted was already taken! So then I was back at square one! Brandon actually came up with One Girls Curls for me! He is so supportive and helpful during this Etsy craze! Check out my shop at www.onegirlscurls.etsy.com Enjoy!!

cute as a button

This is a picture of my latest craft project! I hope to have my etsy store up and running by the end of the week! I will be sure to blog as soon as I do and post pictures! This upcoming Thursday night will be cupcake night in our cake class! I am loving the cake class that Brandon

got for me! I am learning so much and I feel it's realy practical stuff I will use!

Thankfull!!

There are so many days I just sit and am overwhelmed with thankfulness! I am so thankful that my baby sister got to come for a visit! A wonderful family in our church has a beautiful huge house and were going on vacation and offered there house to us to use so we could all stay together while Amber and Trevor were here! They fully stocked the fridge and let us simply be at home in their house! What a blessing! All 13 of us were able to stay under one roof and enjoy each other! That is truly loving like Christ! Who just gives up their house!!

I am thankful for the time we are given with my dad! He is beginning to decline quickly. He is now having to take his pain medication more often, his body is retaining fluid, he can't eat as much as he once did, every time he sits he sleeps, he needs at least 6 naps a day to continue, but I am so thankful he has a great testimony during this all! Sunday night at church he sang Mercy Me's 'Jesus Bring the Rain' if you haven't heard the song it simply states that why would the bad things in our lives make us love God less...what's a little rain...whatever brings Him glory just bring the rain! The congregation gave a standing ovation and I don't believe there was a dry eye in the house. Jared got up to preach directly after dad sang and was so choked up he broke down before he could continue.

On a lighter note...the above picture is my very first cake from my cake decorating class! Brandon got me these classes as my Mother's Day gift and it is so much fun! I feel so accomplished and like I actually did a good job! The instructor is so kind and makes you really believe you can do it so easily! I don't desire to be a professional baker or cake designer by any means but I will be able to make Jaxen's birthday cakes!

Family pics

This extened weekend has been absotly wonderful! My baby sister and her husband came in town and we haven't seen them in almost a year. We all got our family pictures done, attended a baseball game, took mom to the Princess Diana exhibit in Kansas City, and we're staying in a big house all together! We are so very blessed to get this time together!

creativity

My creative juices are a flowin'!! I've always thought of myself as creative and desiring to be artistic in some fashion, but never really lived up to either of those descriptions like I wanted to. I wouldn't say that I can whip something out of the air and sell it for $100 with out trying by any means, but I am simply coming around to the experimental side of creative projects! Don't ask me to paint or draw anything, but give me some ribbons and buttons and I'll surprise you! My near future goal is to start an etsy store and make some extra money. Nothing amazing or making enough to pay the car payment by any stretch of the imagination, but maybe enough to pay our Internet bill or... living on the edge the utility bill! We'll see! My latest project in the picture is button earrings. They are so very easy and they really catch the eye! I posted a picture of them on facebook and not even trying to I sold 7 pairs to 1 person!! I am selling them 2 pairs for $5. So yes, after using a calculator I discovered I made $17.50 on my first ever selling order!!! And that my friends will pay the Internet bill this month! (not that we cannot pay it...just allocating it in my head makes me feel good!) My next project to accomplish is a recipe box! I can picture it in my head and I have purchased all the materials needed so I just need to find time to accomplish it! Pictures to come soon...hopefully!

The love of my life!

Dear Brandon,

I love you so much! Tomorrow we are celebrating our 6 year anniversary! I still remember the first phone call we had that lasted for hours as we both layed in our dorm rooms so anxious to learn more about each other! You are so good to me and always have been! You've taught me what it truly means to be happy!

I still have the wedding gifts you sent me through out the day while I was getting ready! I remember seeing you for the first time that day as I walked down the isle towards you to begin our new life together!

You are such a Godly man and amazing dad to Jaxen! You work hard to provide for us and always make sure we are taken care of before you take care of yourself! I remember our first kiss like it was yesterday! I love you so much! Thankful for the past 6 years and looking forward to the next 60!

I love you!

Love, Your wife!!

Some fun

Brandon and I went on a late date night to go see Pirates of the Caribbean on opening night last weekend! We went after the Relay for Life so we had a late night and it was very fun! There were only like 10 people in the theater and our fun glasses are our 3D glasses! Aren't we cute! Next Saturday we'll be married for 6 years! Some days I can't believe it's been that long and other days it feels like we've been married forever (in a good way).

This upcoming weekend we'll go down to Joplin for Brandon to work in the Walgreen's down there and I'll stay with my sister while he's working. The tragedy of the tornado is so close to us! My older sister and her family are within 5 miles of the devastation. It is all so close to home! It seems like this week that is all everyone is talking about! I pray that in some way God will get the glory from this awful tragedy people are having to suffer!

Last night Jaxen was watching the video camera recordings of the past year that we've taken of him and he was cracking up at himself! He is absolutely funny!! The above picture was taken last Saturday when I went on a girls shopping day with my friends and Brandon and Jaxen had a boy's day! Which entailed playing in the mud puddle of course!

Outside!!!

The weather has been absolutely beautiful lately! Jaxen would live outside if he could! That's all he wans to do is play play play! He has been trying to say more words this week, which is good b/c he is a little slower at speaking then what I would like. I think he's in the process of working on his 2 year mollers. Joyful!! He is sitting right next to me drinking his milk in his right hand and playing with my hair in his left hand!

Thank you for continuing to pray for my dad! He started a chemo regeminet this past Monday. This particular chemo is not for his type of cancer and has less then a 10% of doing any good. The dr. didn't choose to do any scans before he began this treatment which is annoying and makes me feel that she doesn't even think it will work. Please pray for him and his spirits! He has rough days and good days. He is still working full time but we're not sure how much longer he will be able to keep that up. Again, thank you for your prayers!

Mother's Day!

This is a picture of my mom and I. It's not from today but since it's Mother's Day I thought it was fitting.

What an absolutely amazing day we had as the Shatto family! God gives us Mother's Day every year as an uplifting gift that we get spoiled and loved on!

I am so thankful that I get to celebrate today with other mothers! That is not a job that I take lightly! As a little girl I couldn't wait to celebrate Mother's Day and everything that it stood for. As we were trying to get pregnant with Jaxen it was difficult to endure others be joyful on Mother's Day, as selfish as that sounds, but as I look back on that tough time on our life I believe it truly makes me appreciate so much more of what other people go through and also being a mom.

Unfortunately, you don't have to pass a test to be a parent and take a baby home from the hospital! So many people take parenting way too light hearted and not serious enough life the amazing responsibility that it is. God has placed an eternal soul in our hands that we get to shape and mold to serve Him!

Oh, for Mother's Day Brandon and Jaxen spoiled me by giving me a gift certificate to get a pedicure, a gift certificate to Charming Charlie, and my favoritest cake decorating classes!!

My funny guy

Here is a picture of my little man! This was taken last week an hour after bed time! Brandon was getting Jaxen ready for bed and being silly put Jaxen's pants on his head and was dancing, Jaxen decided he wanted the pants on his head and so Brandon gave him what he wanted and boy was it funny! He was so funny and energetic! He ran laps around the house with these pants on his head shrugging his shoulders. He makes us laugh so much!

It's so nice to have such a light hearted comedic relief during some tough days we have! We found out this past Thursday that the insurance will not pay for the trial chemo drug that the St. Louis dr. wanted him to try. So needless to say he was quit depressed and down this past week. Please keep our family in your prayers!

My baby sister is coming home this June for about 10 days so were very much looking forward to her visit! We'll be taking family pictures and having lots of family time! Looking forward to making memories!

Easter Weekend

We had an absolutly wonderful weekend! God is so very good to give us this extra time with our family as we live in Springfield and as Dad is fighting his battle of cancer! We had practiced the "egg hunt game" with Jaxen at home so during the egg hunt at church he would atleaset have an idea about what the concept is. At home it went great and he completely understood the concept. So Saturday we felt good about his hunting abilities and were confident that he could keep up with the best of them. What actually happened during the hunt was very cute. He really just wanted to play in the big open gym space. He was picking up eggs ever so often and sometimes he would put them in his basket and sometimes he would put them in his friends basket. He really couldn't care less about them all! It was funny!

Sunday we got to celebrate Christ with our amazing church family! We have the best church family there is! I wish I could put into words how wonderful it is worship with fellow believers of like faith loudly and to the top of my lungs!

A baby book moment

This past weekend we took Jaxen to his first movie theater! It was a chickie movie, Disney's "Tangled." He did amazing! I had no doubts since he's such a good movie watcher at home! He just sat on my lap and was in awe of the giant screen! He was on cloud 9 with the popcorn too! Brandon took the popcorn bucket off Jaxen's lap to eat his portion and without looking away from the screen Jaxen reached over and grabed it back and put it on his own lap to eat again! We just laughed and enjoyed the moment of our little boy having the time of his life! These are the moments!

Thankful for my Dad

Last Wednesday we took Dad up to a cancer specialist in St. Louis to see if there were any more options they could come up to treat Dad. I went with expectations they would have something that was unheard of down here in Springfield. Sitting in that room with mom, dad, and Lisa we were given the news that unfortunately they had "exhausted all medical treatments" that were known to help his cancer. The Dr. was so nice and intelligent and as he's going through this information. I sat there with a lump in my throat and kept waiting for him to say "but...this is what I think we should do!" They have put dad on a waiting list for a trial drug however this drug has not been proven to help colon cancer only pancreas cancer or lung cancer. The waiting list is very long and they only accept a few people at a time. We're not even sure his insurance will cover the trial drug. That was the Dr.'s only option.

That day is when I realized this awful disease will take my Dad's life. When he was originally diagnosed in June 2008 they said they can't cure him only treat him, however there has always been another option, another treatment, another med that can help, there's always been some good news to go along with the bad news. This time there was no good news. Since that day I have made sure to tell Daddy I love him everyday!

There are times I have to fight off being depressed and weepy and thank God for giving us these next months to enjoy every minute we can with him!

I thank God for giving me a Christian family and loving me enough to give me this time to let my dad know what he means to me! Some people lose a parent in a crash or other immediate circumstances that they don't get the chance to tell them how much they mean to them and how thankful they are for them. I thank God for everyday!

Please Pray!

Please pray today for my dad! He was diagnosed almost 3 years ago with 2 separate stage 4 cancers. Since then he has been through 2 surgeries and countless rounds of chemotherapy. 

Last Monday his oncologist here in Springfield told him there was nothing more they could do for him and that they couldn't get the cancer to stop growing. He has spots on his liver, lungs, and areas around his stomach lining. 

We are going to a cancer specializing hospital in St. Louis this upcoming Wednesday and we have an appointment at noon to see what they can do for him there. Please pray that God heals dad and gives him a full recovery! Pray that our family has peace and patience. Please pray that dads spirits stay up and positive. Thank you!

Happy Birthday Mom!

This past week we got to celebrate my moms birthday! I would tell you how old she is but I'm sure she'll be reading this and would surely kill me for letting you in on that information!
As you can see in the picture there are 3 candles on her cake, those 3 candles stand for being a cancer SURVIVOR for 3 years!
I have the best mom in the world! She would do anything for our family and she's shown me how to be a Godly wife and mother! I remember growing up and how special she would make us feel on our birthday's by making our favorite meals and putting so much thought into our gifts. We didn't have much money so she always made sure that our gifts were special! She always put so much thought and love into each find!
Mom, I love you so much and I thank you for making me the women I am today! You are so special to me and I try to pattern my mothering after you!
I love you more!
Melissa
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Back to Blogging

I am back to blogging! We haven't had Internet at the house so it makes it unfeasible to blog often. We had tax money set aside and last night we went to Best Buy and came home with Brandon a Mac and myself an Asus netbook! I love it! I am currently sitting at my moms using their Internet in hopes we will have Internet at home sooner rather then later.

Jaxen will be 18 months this week! He is so much stinkin' fun! He has learned that he likes to make us laugh. He is definitely an entertainer! Being a mom is the greatest job ever! He brings so much joy and laughter to my soul after a long day of work! Just seeing his face in the morning when he wakes up and he wants nothing more then to cuddle with momma and drink his milk is the best part of my day!

We have had 2 interviews with East Side Baptist Church in Topeka KS and are going up to check out the church the weekend of March 27th to see if we are a good match so please keep that in your prayers! We both feel like we are so very ready to jump back into full time ministry and can't wait to see where the Lord places us!